Day 1857

Part 2!

Come in, bill on the table (like that makes it my problem?) over $1,100. From what? It's last hospitalization. Pity.

Of course It goes on a tear, "if you had Cobra..." Again, forgetting Cobra would've cost the mortgage payment. Add that to the $29,000 bill and It has quite expensive habits. Now, add THAT to Its plan to go on vacation (????? from what?????). So, you have $ to, in effect, maintain 2 cars, you plan to go away for a week, yet have no means to pay your debts. Hmmmm. It seems to think I have vast cash reserves when I constantly tell It I pay every motherfucking bill, that's it.

Now, rewind the tape to when I started on Ward's Island. Did I not urge It to go Civil Service? Did I not say the two of us could conquer the world w/2 Civil Service careers? Yet, It used child care as the excuse to maintain bullshit jobs (hmmmm DAYCARE??? Funny, you had no problem ditching him with a drug addict when you went to the beach, remember Snaggletooth?).

Now, Stoney's maturing, part of this is learning the value of a dollar. Of course he's a GREAT kid, exemplary in fact. But you can't live what you never learned. So, he still leans on It for $10 for pizza etc...meanwhile he smokes his paychecks, with never any discussion to savings. The $ Pedrito gave him from mom's trust alone could'a paid for college, but that got pissed away. Now, there's nothing to show for it but student loans. Worst of all: if he played his cards right, the $ he earns from his gig could pay for college, but It never reinforced living within your means. But then, it gets mad 2 him for keeping beer in the fridge from his birthday get together with his peeps. Let that sink in: It has no problem with his being flagrant with smoking-i.e.his bong prominently displayed-but leave beer in the fridge? THAT makes it go off.

Notice a pattern here? It tends to rage at pretty much everything. Good 12 step person. Good Jeeeeeeeeezus person. GREAT parenting.

So, yes, I'm Satan. It can't manage shit, just look @ the state of the house as a telling example. But I need counseling. And of course, it now practices Its patented cut and run approach/a.k.a. never finish what you started. To whit: all the divorce talk. Go ahead, assume half the debt. Good luck. Keep charging, keep shopping.

But I need counseling.

But wait, there's more! It, again, gives Stoney the tired line of "your father never gave you any money for the past 5 years." Let that sink in. Who gave him lunch money, when I didn't did It NOT buy Snapple and provide for Stoney, no, he leaned on his peeps? So, of course I take the time to, without anger, remind him that EVERY MOTHERFUCKING BILL is paid for by Satan. That he has a house to live in due to yours truly, Satan. While it spends $ on crap, I pay bills, and that I do so joyfully, as opposed to It who makes us all pay the price of Its psychosis on a daily basis.

Funny, It has no benefits, it isn't on meds, It rages every night. Hmmmmm. Wonder if Its "friends" ever called its attention to THAT?

(but It DOES get close to $700 a month from disability, + what It earns from working. Tough life).

So, let's do the math: I work all day, I come home, I try to sleep, It screams and take all its shit out on me. And I need counseling.