day 251

25 freakin' years!!!

You know it and I do. Nothing else matters. It's called humility. It DOES hurt that the bitch I married does all this 12 step crap and doesn't even remember, but I shouldn't expect that of a psycho. What rubbed salt in the wound was It's going psycho on me today of all days. Especially with manana being that big religious day-you know how It hides behind religion. So much for practicing what you preach-either vis a vis religion or 12 stepology.

Did the Flushing Meadows half. Wow. REALLY couldn't have been better timed. My youth spent there, going every Sunday to the World's Fair, Mets games aplenty, playing in Flushing Meadows, bike riding there, races there. Wow. Really made my day. LOVE Queens.

Perfect temps for a race of this distance: cool to start-wore a pullover/throwaway I can't bring myself to throwaway-threw it in the vehicle on the second pass. The course wasn't as bad as we'd imagined. We'd taken to calling it "The Maze," since Flushing Meadows is about 4+ miles. But they laid it out well. Plenty of spectators, they promised bands everywhere-not so much, but enough to keep us going. Water and gatorade @ every mile. REALLY hit the spot. College Point (such as it is, it's 3 remaining members-Leo, Carlos and the fat deaf guy, were course marshalls). The only glitch: a fake finish, 800m from the end you entered what you thought were chutes-it was spectators lining the sides, NEAR the end. You still had 800m to go. But all things considered, I'd do it again. STILL miss the Scotland Run, but Queens gots'ta win every time. Did 5 mins better than my usual, brought it in under 10 per mile, with Rob, Fran, and Elik there, hadda. Didn't want them waiting too long. Cool medal! Of course Scoop was there, reporting news of the latest race boycott. Still can't believe they believed his bullshit. So much for trust. Believe a rumor started by a halfwit.

Inescapably sad though. Really would'a been nice to celebrate, but Stoney's all alone, It's @ Its friends house (abandon your son on Easter eve, nice, AND he's sick), so SOMEBODY'S gotta be a parent. No time to be selfish. Sucks for me, but it's not about me-it's about being a parent. How the fuck I get through this without alcohol/drugs/or food binges is amazing.

***funny, It has no $$$, yet just bought Stoney a laptop-as we have 1/8 inch of water from the perpetually clogged toilet. Like living in a slum.

****Pix below, thanks Helen!!!