Day 1403

Nice.

Spent Saturday completely away from Sybil. You'd think a religion teacher, especially on Holy Saturday, would be well behaved. But remember Christmas: I got shit. So, in the am, ran, bumped into Dennis @ The Line. Was supposed to Spin, but no sub for the instructor, so off I went. Was a beautiful morning, shorts and gloves. Ran w/a peep who'd been dying for years to run with me-why I'll never know. Between his pace and my injury, ran/walked 3 miles. But had a blast. Then weights.

Had plans to hook up with make believe friends (pic below)for a concert later, so filled the rest of the day with movies. Had a really good day, then the evening was FUN!!! Ear shattering tunes, most bands fronm Queens, in a postage stamp sized venue.

A really good day!

Day 1402

Happy Good Friday?

Bitch goes to church, comes in, same Bitch, same rage. go Jeeeeeesus!

Fucking waste of flesh.

Stoney, ending spring break week hangin' with a peep. Vegging. Ahhh, time well spent. Fortunately, temps are purrrrrfect, hit The Line. then Spin. Tonight, we rock!!!!!

Thank God!

Day 1401

:)

TGIF!!!!!

Hadda take some fridays, as I got too many hours, good. Bitch is quiet, Stoney @ the gym, had a good evening.

Yesterday was classic.

Woke up, hit the asphalt, got my miles. Then Spin class (had the same instructor @ night, we both looked 2 each other-cool), then was asked to sit on a panel. a panel convenes when an employee grieves an unsatisfactory eval. What a blast! Listen to someone else's shit for a couple'a hours? I can do that! AND got to see one of my favorite people, an agency bro. Really nice.

Day 1400

PURE unadulterated BITCH.

It's on a tear, again.

Opened the gas bill. Now remember, why would YOU open something if it wasn't your responsibility? It? Because It's a twat of course. So It goes on a tear about the gas being shut off etc.....with Stoney and his friends present. Of course Stoney asked, of course I told him his mother is mental, just like her mother, and that without drama It isn't happy.

And remember, It expects me to do Its taxes???????

So got a really good run in yesterday morning. Of course the temps were amazing-40 ish-and of course BITCH had the heat cranked. (this am, 50+, every heater is on, hence, "the bakery."). THEN, a good Spin class.

Nice.

...and by the way...what's it like to come in after a hard day @ the job and NOT have a mental twat to cope with?

Day 1339

Goldfish and chocolate cake

...And how did YOU spend YOUR Spring Break????

Stoney? Vegetating. "Take half your money, bank it, spend the other half." Did HE listen? Did It support me? What do they, combined have, DEBT. Well done. And now you have interest in babes, what do ya have to use with them, nothing. Well done. But you know me, Satan.

Yesterday was odd. Got my miles, so far so good, but then the night fell apart-not entirely bad. Usually start with Spin, then Pilates then Conditioning. The instructor had a death in the fam, so Spin, then chill for an hour, then I was the only one to stay for the 8pm class-so I suggested we call it a night-one on one Spin is weird.

Feel like I took a day off, but I did get to do some weight work instead. A very good night...until.....The Bakery. Almost 50 degs and the Mental patient has each electric heater on. Stoney? Playing computer games, oblivious, until he has to blow his nose...again.....still...

Glad I paid for his gym membership.

Day 1338

JEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ

Stoney has a week off. Good news: he actually cleaned up his room, looks good! Bad news: dogshit? Walked the dog????? "I want a doggie....." right.

And Sybil? Suffice to say I call Toxichouse "The Bakery." Bitch is really sick. Can't even breathe. Wonder why their noses are always running? Fucking petri dish we exist within.

But, got my miles AND Pilates!

Bumped into Dennis, he didn't know about the 5m Challenge, said as long as there isn't a conflict, he'd be there! How cool would that be?

Day 1337

His problem, my crisis.

Again: "take half spend, other half, bank." THIS is what I told him when he got Christmas or birthday $. Did It back me up? Of course not. What does he have now, nothing.

Last week, 10 on thurs, 10 on fri. Wants 10 today, might be with a girl. Big spender. Get a job.

Of course, I come in yesterday, house is like a fucking bakery. These are some very sick people. 45 degrees out and every ELECTRIC heater is on. Pay a bill bitch.

And enjoy your taxes.

IT band appears in order, actually standing pain free. Either the half or yesterday fixed it. Yesterday? Spin, Pilates, then Conditioning.

Day 1336

Size matters

Bitch came in with a mini Chinese food bag. It has no $. Pity.

Stoney? A week off. His shit hit the fan because HE has no job. Thus, no $. No wonder Bitch hit on me. Now, rewind the tape: didn't I consistently tell him: "take half and bank it, the other half, spend," did EITHER asshole listen? Sucks for them.

Did the Flushing Meadows Half. Really emotional. Where did I spend so many weekends? AND, to add to the drama, I took a tumble @ mile 9+. SHIT!!!!! But, got up, bounced up actually, and finished! Helen in front of me, Rhea behind. I was ok with that.

A very good day!

Day 1335

"Oh, and you're going to have to give me money"


...and how are YOU dear?

Bitch actually has the tits to tell me that last night, for the $ IT gave Stoney while my id was being replaced. Bear in mind, I continued to give him lunch money.  Thursday I gave him $10, yesterday HE has the balls to ask for more, for $ HE borrowed during this same period!!!!! Imagine!!!!! Notes all over everything in the fridge "do not touch, do not take," one day when I arranged shit in the fridge, HE goes on a tear and moves around all my shit, and I'm supposed to be a bank??????????

Really?

Do your own taxes twat! Pay on the income from which you have no deductions removed!

Moral: I'm supposed to be a doormat/bank. Good. Who has a career?

Last night, GREAT venue, hangin' with my make believe friends catchin' the NRPS. Amazing time, amazing venue. Great night. Until I came in.

Bitch actually spoke, again (like clockwork, every fri/sat) blackmailing: "you need to give me money or.....divorce........" question: suppose we divorced: would It still show up @ my brothers for free dinners-as Its family is unknown/buried?

Hmmmm, what WOULD Jeeeeeesus do? Go teach bitch. Get me some palm.

Gives its son money (imagine?) and expects to get reimbursed??????????

Day 1334

tgif

Nice to have a day to chillax. It will be workin', Stoney @ school, doing...schoolin? Heading into nyc. Tonight, Port Washington to hook up with my make believe friends.

A nice way to start the weekend, prematurely.

REALLY good day yesterday, ran, am Spin, then pm Spin. Felt enveloped by health.

Day 1333

:)

Show last noght at my fave venue, same seats as Drowning Pool. Headbanging Goodness. Nice.

Had my miles in the am, followed by Spin. Drama @the job, unnecessary drama (one of those "the person needs to retire" situations), but I was teflon. Long as you're in the groove, you're ok!

Then headbanging. What more could you ask for?

Day 1332

Better!

IT Band killing me, but, got 5 m in this am.

In the pm, with Toxichouse looming, did spin, Power Pilates, then Conditioning. Didn't wanna, was hoping the classes would fill up, but they didn't-and I can't resist a challenge. Fighting that aging process. Told ya, what fucked me up: I never look in the mirror-hate those gym muscled heads who admire themselves. But, sometimes it's unavoidable. I like what I saw. Nice.

Good motivation.

Day 1331

TOTAL bitch

Actually had a good day, was made permanent, nice. I love my job AND my agency-hard work is rewarded. A rare feat: a functional agency. Nice.

Then, the gym. No run, couldn't after 13.1. Power Pilates, was a very good class.

Unfortunately, hadda go to Toxichouse. All was well until the Bitch blew a circuit breaker-yes, Its head IS up Its ass. Of course, THAT devolves into rage: the electric system is.....you need to.....rather than just admit: "I fucked up and overloaded the circuit." Actually, no joke, interrogated me re: "why did you use the side door?"

STILL think I'm kidding?

Wait, it got better.

Stoney asks me not to sing. If I were screaming it'd have been legit, I was barely above a hum.

Great, 2 raging mental patients.

I apparently don't have the right to sing in my own house-though it's ok to blast rap, AND I have to account for my every movement.

Good thing I did my own taxes. Good luck to you! Sick of paying for abuse. Learn to have deductions taken out!!!

And sing if you wish, it's healthy. Don't like it? Enjoy your misery!

Day 1330

Glad I did it!

Had serious misgivings about the NYC Half. Aside from zero support on the homefront, being the object of rage the night before (great to do a race with neither rest nor support), I pulled the glute/IT band shit. Limping ain't fun. BUT, I preregged, AND, could I really d.n.s.? What added to it, peeps were doing the 4 x 2's in Eisenhower. 2 miles I could (probably) do, 13.1? Ouch.

The one thing I envy: peeps who "train." They never know how good they got it. That involves someone @ home who actually cares, or at the very least, doesn't subvert your best efforts. Must be nice. For me, supplying my own necessities is a feat unto itself. And I don't have disability (or someone ELSE to pay the taxes on it) to help. I'm completely on my own. Kind'a like running a marathon ain't it?  ;)

Got a great parking spot-upside of wanting to get the FUCK away from the Bitch asap, napped, got up, strolled to the start. THAT was the toughest part. Cold, not unbearable, but cold. I was on the fence re: shorts or longs. Opted for longs. With my knees, rather sweat that pain/shiver.

Lo and behold, I didn't totally suck! I finished, better than my Manhattan Half time (2 loops around Central Park SUUUUUUUCKS), after mile 10 I needed walk breaks, but I did ok. There was actually someone behind me.

High points: seeing Mr.G in Central Park-I hope he realizes what he means to the running community-AND he has the same injury, running down 7th ave, through Times Square, and of course: The Medal!

Do I wish I did the 4 x 2's? Suffice to say: I would'a run much better, BUT, they won. If I was there they wouldn't've. Glad for them. REALLY glad I did the half, I'm hurt as hell-this time physically too, but I ran. I was happy. First time in too long.

And the BEST perk: not a word from Bitch. It celebrated Palm Sunday by, again, ignoring Its son to hang with friends, then buying Applebees takeout (remember, if I don't supply lunch $ he goes without). Bitch. Useless bitch.

Day 1329

Bitch

Attends a funeral-of course didn't tell me anything about it or the wake, then will hold against me that I didn't attend, then palm sunday mass, then rages about my being such a _________ again, what would JEEEEEESUS do?

And no wonder, who was there as well, It's main bitch peep/groupie/enabler. Good. let the two share their misery. That one got divorced, so of course, husbands are bastards. That's the one for whom I wrote a resume. Was a pleasure to do so, but of course all that's forgotten.

(fyi, all those "friends" to whom It gives every detail, don't they ever tell It "why do you feel the need to air every shred of your private life?") Do I not have a right to privacy? Apparently not. But then again, my parents gave me an example, they made lives for themselves rather than drink incessantly, do drugs, or commit suicide. My father drank himself to death, after coming up from nothing to be a chef. Each member of my family became professionals. Not one quit. Unlike YOU . Never followed through on anything. Cancer sucked and is a tragedy, but you're using it for all it's worth.

Today, The Half. Do either of them care, not a stitch. More concerned with pointing the finger at me. Good. Fuck 'em. You'd THINK someone who runs marathons, who lost 200+ pounds would be an example, OR a source of shared pride, but no, rather, scorn. Good. I'll be the one turning off the lights as others look upon their wasted lives.

And yes, they're monitoring my posts.

Day 1328

Nancy

Died. Sucks. John, her husband, is an amazing human, and she was kinder than hell, but had ms. Of course, Sybil attached Itself to this (having grown up with John, AND of course, another excuse to ignore your home totally and focus on others).

Nancy was giving and sweet, something everyone thinks Sybil is. Take a lesson Bitch!

Of course, note: did Sybil say anything about the funeral etc...? Of course not, and you KNOW this will be thrown in my face.

Hmmm...what would JEEEEESUS do?

Nancy, you're in my heart, you will be missed. But, Sybil is there, you can have It.

Spends all day and all evening out yesterday, probably consoling John. Good.

Translation: miss Nancy terribly, but  I had a peaceful evening.

And now, let the games begin! Sybil gets to hang with Its main bitch friend @ the funeral-translation: my Satan quotient will rise.

Some people: they work, wife has cooked, cleaned etc...they get return on their investment. Me? I go to work, make treatment available for the needy, lead the staff, come home: my son is poisoned to hate me/disrespect me-yet doesn't lift a finger (9pm: hangin' with the stoners: "did you feed Hulk?"  "no."  "I want a doggie........."), and I egt the joy of psychotic notes from a total Bitch who has the world convinced the poor thing is a victim......@ 54 years of age.............poor thing.

"I didn't ask to be a mother." Nice. Go teach religion. Get some palms for me.

Day 1327

Hi Keith!

Hi Dana!

Yes, this IS being monitored.

So, wake up this am to a note tacked to my clothes. More raging. Own your shit willya? Amazing how whenever It has a problem, I become the focus. Way to own your shit. Nice sobriety. Hmmm, wonder what JEEEEEEEEEEEEEESUS would do? Rage about YOUR psychotic imaginings (you took....) but feel YOU have the right to arbitrarily rearrange whatever you choose to?

Remember, when It exited the hospital, each time, the house was PERFECT. since, It has allowed the place to become a shipwreck. AND, got Stoney to believe I'm the root of all evil.

No problem. I know wassuop, God knows wassup, and my peeps know the score.

Actually asked if It had given me Its tax forms. Like I'm actually gonna do ITS taxes? (not to mention not remembering whether you'd given the forms? Kinda living in la la land aren't we?).

PAY YOUR OWN!

Never had any deductions and year after year expected ME to cover Its ass. Fuck it, I'm done with that. Continue being a bitch=do your own taxes. And tack a note to THAT!

Take your meds already.

Day 1326

Payback's a what?

Come in yesterday, It's stalking the front door-needed AAA to come by and jump start Its car-moron. Needless to say, that morphs into a "all my friends..."  "all your money..." rage. Bitch. Pure unadulterated bitch. Whenever something hits the fan, my fault (really good sobriety there. Keeping the focus are we? Owning our issues are we? Not for a second. Everything is always someone else's fault). And again, when Its friends either give ME a full accounting of THEIR finances, OR when It tells me every penny It earns and how it is spent, or unless the Bitch's friends pay my bills, until either of those are met, fuck 'em all. Best of all: in the homes of Its friends: does the father have to supply his own food and basics??????????????????????????? Nope, Bitches cook and clean. This one? Nothing. I mean NOTHING. Oops my bad, BLAME, yes, otherwise, nothing. When I asked what it did during the course of the day (turning Its attempted interrogation back to It), It responds "went to a meeting...." same shit, get a life willya? Clean your fucking basement! Don't wait for MY peeps to do YOUR work.

So, the casting went well, always a thrill for the fat kid who couldn't do a lap around the gym to be asked to appear for a shoot requiring "handsome, healthy non model types." Now, in a NORMAL family, the members would share the joy. This, from the bitch who couldn't be bothered watching the correct channel when I was on tv.

Good luck with your shipwreck.

Day 1325

Sometimes things work out

Was worried because I'd miss my Spin this am (???) who ends up running last night's class as a sub? This am's scheduled instructor. Nice. So, Got my miles, Spin, Pilates, then Conditioning (someone is overcompensating). THIS is why I avoid mirrors. Though I DID really like what I saw, now I'm trapped-gotta maintain.

Stoney? Poked my head in yesterday, he was outta school, tummy ache. Really has his mother wrapped round his finger. Third week in which he decides to make it a 4 day week. Whatever. and yes, another note on food in the fridge "do not take, do not touch." Do not care. And It? Reinforces this dysfunction. He DOES have a point, all I do is work all day to pay for the place neither He nor It do a fucking thing for. Did he lift a finger, no, was in all day, playing computer games. It? Teaches religion, tried convincing the world It is sober, doesn't lift a finger in Toxichouse.

Woodley STILL asks if either of 'em did a fucking thing to clean the basement? Of course not. Too busy putting stickits on food in the fridge.

Amazing.

Day 1324

:)!!!

Good day on the job, some changes going on, all good, :)!!!!!

GREAT day on The Line, got my 7!

So-So @ the gym, did Pilates -REALLY happy with the results. Actually saw myself in the mirror and didn't cringe!

Call from my peeps re: death metal concert, yay!!!!!!!!

Then, got called for a commercial! How cool is that?

Day 1323

TOTAL bitch

Remember, didn't have one nanosecond of contact with the angry displacing hypocrite all weekend-it was great. Yesterday evening, It tries, first asked "how was your day," then the interrogation began, until, I told It I wasn't answering questions. It, literally, stormed off in a huff, pissed It couldn't pick a fight. go teach religion.

And yes, I DID get my picture taken with Brooooce, and yes, it will hang in my office where the bitch can't take it. Thank GOD I have a wonderful job.

This am, 40 degs-and yes, every electric heater IS on. Bake the house bitch. And they wonder why they perpetually sniffle?????????

Gonna get my miles and love every second.

Day 1322

MORE gooder!

Temps yesterday were KILLER!!!!!

Got my miles, the Line had been plowed. Hit Spin class-bumped into my peep Dennis Walcott, he'd been running in the street. Amazing how many don't know Parks Dept does a great job of spoiling us! Thus, got my miles, then Spin. Felt GREAT.

Unfortunately, that's where it ended. Remember, every Saturday It goes PSYCHO-"you need counseling,"  "I can't live like this...."(so, DIE!!!!!),  "what're we gonna do about..." a.k.a. "Drama Saturdays." So, hung out in Manhattan with my peeps-you know, my make believe friends. We're in a karaoke club, who walks in, BROOOOOCE and his wife Patti! And no, didn't ask for an autograph-if Bitch was kind-or had actually gotten me at least a fucking Christmas card, I would've. Go teach religion, phony.

(It comes in, after being out all day, pizza. Ahhhhh, home cookin'.)

And yes, 50+ degs, each heater is on. Oil heat, off. Psycho.

But, I had my Broooooce moment. And yes, he IS as nice a guy as he appears.

(morning with Walcott, afternoon with Brooooooce. Nice.)

Day 1321

Shipwreck

Come in, It's parked in front of the house. Really no biggie, I really don't give a fuck, BUT, if I parked in Its space, you KNOW It'd go psycho. and all because of an inch of snow? Of course, I asked where Stoney was (he couldn't help?)  "It's friday, he's out." Can't help your mother? Nope, leave it to Dad, as with everything. Told you, useless. Got smoke?

So, miles yesterday in the snow, felt liberating!

Yes, pulled a glute, IT band injury. slow as fuck, but motherfucker I'm in shape!

Day 1320

So much for Don Henley.

Playing @ my fave venue, one week before Joe Walsh. Tix-and shit tix @ that: $250!!!!! Best seats:  $300!!!!! Are you fucking kidding me????? THOSE are Bruce/Stones prices. Who the FUCK this asshole think he is? Put him and Joe together, half an Eagle. Fuck him. amazing.

Snow finally came, 'bout 4 inches. Yes, lacin' em up! Remember when Pret and I used to hit The Line cushioned by snow? Our feet the only ones in freshly fallen gauze? Oh well, at least I'm still in the game. And to cover myself, spin yesterday am, AND yesterday pm.

Day 1319

Figures

Postponed the bored/membership meeting to next week, so, yesterday, no precip 'til later. Typical. Told the psych patients living under my roof I was gonna be on tv, they watch the wrong channel. Imagine your parents being on tv, you'd make the world stop to watch. These people couldn't be bothered.

Best of all, Stoney hits on first bank of dad! HELLO!!!!!! No wallet=no$. Moron.

THEN, he has the balls to attempt to question me re: "why do you ALWAYS havta move stuff in the fridge?" Can you imagine? Like it really fucking matters? Add that to ZERO respect.

Go smoke a lil, take the edge off. See you at your next court appearance, THEN we'll talk.

It? Useless, says nothing. Takes him shopping. Do THAT math. They go shopping, I get hit on for $. BUT, god forbid I put order to the fridge?

Psych patients.

And you bet I got my gym time in! Nothing stopping me!!!!!

(and also, yes it WAS cool to have Michael Strahan single me out as "the guy with the cool shades.")

Day 1318

"Please leave me $10?"

Does it not occur to him that no wallet=no $$$. Duh. If my peep hadn't loaned me some $ he'd have no lunch $-as we ALL know his mother won't pony up-plenty of $ for Snapple but if I don't get him lunch $ he'd havta mooch off his peeps. Enjoy the diabetes.

Got my miles, then hadda log extra gym time (Spin, Pilates, then Conditioning. Ouch!). Today's an off day-heading into nyc for a taping! Is that cool or what? Told Sybil, sure It'll pay no notice. That's ok. Doing it with two of my "make believe friends."

Got in, they were munching on Chinese food. Tough life.

-but I get hit on for $.

Day 1317

Drank it!

My peep now loves The Paramount. TOLD him he'd drink the kool-aid. WONDERFUL place. Almost feel like I live there (I wish!).

Got my miles yesterday, cold, not brutal. Fortunate there, later it got WINDY! Then, Pilates. A good evening.

Down side, my wallet's m.i.a. Pain in the ass THAT is, but compared to a "Is she normal, or is It a  Bitch," a missing wallet is no biggie.

Day 1316

Toilet paper.

Yep, toilet paper.

THAT'S the excuse it used to go on a rant, as in "did you take the toilet paper?"

Amazing, could you possibly be more of a psycho bitch???????

Admit it: you ignored your red light tickets, you went shopping (buy MORE crap @ Unique, that'll eventually be thrown out because it's soaked from a basement which is a mess), now you have NOTHING to show for 54 years of life.

NOW you're panicking because you lack resources-after 4-yep-four failed career attempts: secretary, waitress, real estate, social worker. Kind'a sensing a lack of follow through????? No wonder you rage about divorce, something requires walk, quit. Bitch.

AND, "I didn't ask to be a mother." Guess all those years of going OFF birth control were because you were too lazy to get your prescription filled???????

And yes, It leaves the house, every fucking heater ON.

Totally useless human.

Last night: again, picking a fight. Asked if I had the taxes done. How the FUCK could I without Its paperwork? You know, on the $$$ It pays NO taxes on, leaving that to me??????

Pure, Useless, Bitch.

Next negative word: It pays Its own taxes. learn to have $ withdrawn rather than zero deductions. THEN It'll learn!

Actually had the tits to ask if I used toilet paper????? This from the same Bitch who interrogates me for actually having the BALLS to consume something from the fridge!!!!!

What would JEEEEEESUS do????? Go teach religion, fucking phony! (Did HE ask to be a savior???).

BEST of all, remember, they monitor my computer usage.

Enjoy reading this!

Live laugh love!!!

Day 1315

"Don't touch this, don't take this."

THAT'S the stickit note I found on cold cuts. Should'a written on the flat screen: "don't use my cable."

Can you imagine? so much for "family." and yes, Bitch taught religion in the am. And I need counseling. and I'M a hypocrite.

No matter. Had a nanosecond in their presence. Yesterday was Huntington day. 4m in the am, spent the day with my make believe friends (you know, my peeps who actually did something with their lives?), then in the evening, my fave venue for a GREAT show! GREAT day.

Unfortunately, stick it note.

Fuck 'em. Enjoy your oreos.

Day 1314

Better!

Plans made for D.C. nice. More fun with my "make believe friends."

Meanwhile, It grills me over "did you take the toilet paper in the basement?" Really.

Stoney? Keeping Oreos and cereal under his bed, god forbid I touch it. Nope, can't make this stuff up. Hope the mice enjoy it.

God forbid they share. While enjoying MY house with MY cable and MY electricity.

Unbelieveable.

Really fun last night @ the pasta dinner, overheard people talking about "that's the guy we read about in the paper." Unfortunately, THAT resulted in my having only one plate, lol.

Day 1313

Absolute bitch.

It leaves for "work" @ the crack of noon, leaves the heater on, yep, 50 degs and the heater's on, and does it do shit in the basement? Nope.

A fucking stranger cares more.

Useless bitch. But yes, It has the god given right to critique.

Best of all: yesterday, what do I find amongst Its shit in the basement, MORE of my shit It stole (unless It has a Secretary who gave it a t shirt with guitars all over it, or ran the NY Marathon. I COULD be wrong).

PURE bitch.

Tell THAT to your lawyer.

concert pix below, what a cool place!!!!